Basically top links are defined in the hellokids theme in particular in the following file:
My Cart / Checkout – \app\design\frontend\default\helloTheme\layout\checkout.xml
Look for the xml block and comment out the action tags such like <!-- <action>...</action --> within the block below: <reference name="top.links">
To remove the wishlist link you have to update your wishlist.xml file – although in my HelloTheme, it was not there, so best practice is to copy and paste it from your base (\app\design\frontend\base\default\layout\wishlist.xml) and put it in the (\app\design\frontend\default\helloTheme\layout) folder and then comment out the line as above.
To create your own links you have to find the links.phtml view file:
Line 37 is an example of how to get the home page statically binded.
So if you want a contact page you just add a new list item: <li class="linkss"><a href="<?php echo $this->getUrl('contact-us')?>"><span>About</span></a></li>
In this case i have a page already in my cms with a url-key of contact-us. To make life easier, try and match this with your url-key rather than adding an absolute link.